To the moms who think they lost their joy for life: I want you to please start the journey of finding it again.
I need you to have a spark of hope of encouragement, but more than that, I want you to know there is someone in your corner: me. Someone who believes in you. Someone who gets the excuses and understands the chaos and knows how deeply deeply painful it can be to look in the mirror and not know the person in the reflection staring back at yourself.
I know, because that once was me.
I lost my heart. I lost myself. But I didn’t realize it. I really really thought I was being a great mom. I thought I was checking all the boxes on the ‘live a good life and everyone will be happy’ checklist. Yet, there was this gap, this space, this wondering about myself and my own heart. The things I loved. The spaces that made me laugh. The moments that made my eyes sparkle. The people that was aligned with my values and heart.
I quickly allowed to get squashed by cries of mom, spilled milk, ‘wife duties’ and my family needing me. So I would tuck that part of me, that deeply joyful part down just a bit more.
Do more, be more, be better, deny yourself and all of that.
I starved out my heart, in a way.
But in that starving came this bit of me that would look around at everyone else and think when will I get to be me again?
And I hated that space. It was lonely and it felt daunting. Especially when the demands of my life and motherhood seemed to crowd out my own heart. I felt lost.
I don’t want you to storm out of your life and leave everything behind. BUT I do want you to decide that every single day you are going to do one thing that will make you a better person, that makes you smile and gets you closer to your soul. One thing that could change your life. I’m talking one simple thing.
Can you imagine a year of doing one thing everyday? All of a sudden that one thing becomes a story, an adventure, a journey. And in it all you have decided, you will be teaching your children that you matter. I seriously cannot think of a more beautiful lesson than showing our children: our value.
I wrote this because I was you, and if I made it happen I believe you can do it too.